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Alltop, confirmation that I kick ass

Author: toni

~ 06/10/09


So I was driving Julia and her friend Jake to school just before summer break. They’re both in first grade. Or WERE anyway. 

We live just up the hill from the local high school. And everyday, we pass it and spend an annoying amount of time entangled in the traffic there. So against our wills, we get to observe the HIGH SCHOOL KIDS in all their glory as they make their way to school in various ways: the privileged kids driving wildly to school without regard for traffic laws, the car-less kids looking sullen and embarrassed as they get dropped off by parents, the environmentally (probably not by choice) ones walking to school and dashing across the street in front of us so that I have to SLAM ON MY BRAKES and curse silently because I have children in the car! (I CANNOT WAIT until Julia is older…lemme tell you.)

As we were waiting (as usual) for someone’s PARENT to stop and drop their kid off in a traffic lane! … I decided to play a game. (I do this a lot in the car. It’s annoying if you’re over 8).


ME: Let’s play a game! How about you guys IMAGINE what you will be like when YOU’RE in high school?

JAKE: (bright beyond his years and always ready with an answer) I’ll be older. I’ll be taller. I’ll be smarter. I’ll be in the science club. I’ll be in the chess club. AND I’ll be on the football team!

ME: (imagining the logistical nightmare of swinging chess tournaments with football practice) Wow! That’s quite a future you’ve got there, Jake.

JAKE: I know!

I looked back at Julia who was silently looking out the window at the TEEN MOB surrounding us.

ME: What about you, Julia? How will you be different when you get to high school?

JULIA: (dead serious) More shorts and tank tops!


I looked out the window at what she was seeing…the ocean of adolescent females displaying more breast and leg than I’ve ever displayed (oh let’s face it, than I’ve EVER HAD) in my life!

I looked back at Julia who was sporting a devilish GRIN. And I SWORE I glimpsed the teenager she would become. Tattoos, tanktops and all. A shiver shot through my ovaries and straight up to the mommy center of my brain. I GULPED.

Do they still have nunneries? Cuz if they do, she might be getting thee to one!

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