So recently on our vacation we went rafting on The Truckee River in Lake Tahoe! And by rafting I mean floating in 3 feet of water at 1 MPH for 8 miles while surrounded by hundreds of other rafts filled with DRUNKEN COLLEGE STUDENTS and BRATTY KIDS with those mondo squirt guns that shoot 40 feet …right at your head!

Now the unfortunate thing about being in nature is that sometimes, in addition to DRUNKS and BRATS, you come face-to-face with, well, nature. And it can be a little hard to explain to a 7 year-old who still thinks that fairies bring babies.

Case in point, the TWO DRAGONFLIES that alighted on my arm to “do the nasty”.

JULIA: What the heck are they doing?!

ME: (contemplating telling the truth but deciding I didn’t have near enough margaritas in my system) Uh…Refueling!

Being a child of vehicle-obsessed California and therefore having spent many hours of her formative years sitting in a car while I pumped gas, she accepted this answer and went back to rowing.

WHEW! I dodged that bullet YET AGAIN. I’m safe on the birds and the bees (and the dragonflies) talk… until she accidentally orders PAY PER VIEW on the TV while searching for “Spongebob”.

SIDE NOTE: Please. No comments about my hairy arms or the obvious lack of sunscreen in my youth.