It seems that no matter how many times I tell Julia to hang up her jacket or put her plate into the sink, she never remembers. So I have to tell her again and again and again. I keep thinking it’s like language where they say a baby has to hear a word 1000 times before they learn it. Except, well, I’m pretty sure I’ve told Julia more than a 1000 times to hang up her jacket. Still, nothin’.

And then the other day I was vacuuming and when I was done I pushed the button on the retractable cord like I have done 1000 times before. And the end of the cord WHACKED my bare ankle, like it has done 1000 times before. And  I thought to myself  “I need to make sure my ankle is clear of that cord when I retract it”, like I have thought 1000 times before but NEVER ACTUALLY REMEMBER TO DO! Despite the reminder bruises that are quite visible.

And this got me to thinking that maybe there are some things WE NEVER LEARN, no matter how many times people or life or retractable cords remind us. And the more I thought, the more I realized, YEP that’s right.

Some things in life aren’t LIVE AND LEARN. They’re more like RINSE AND REPEAT.

 

THINGS I NEVER SEEM TO LEARN

 

• To get my bare ankles clear of the retractable cord on the vaccuum cleaner while it’s retracting…as stated.
• To CUT NOT PULL the plastic tag off a piece of clothing.
• That if I buy chips, I WILL eat them.
• That if I don’t double tie my Nikes before my run, I WILL have to stop and re-tie them.
• That if I have coffee at 6pm I will be up at 3am.
• Not to say anything of importance (or that requires retention) during a Lakers game.
• To give the deodorant a minute before putting on that dark top.
• That if it has the name Michael Bay anywhere in the credits I will not only be disappointed, I will likely be confused about what’s going on action-wise AND end up with a pounding headache.
• That paying for a Pay-Per-View movie that starts after 9 pm is a wasted $4.99.
• That if it says sulfites on the label, I WILL get a stuffy nose.
• To let sleeping dogs lie. Especially if the dog is your husband and it’s the weekend.
• NOT to ask my mother “How are things?”
• That wishing really, really hard won’t counteract the affect of those appetizers and cocktails on my thighs.

 

And there you have it. There are probably more, but I don’t remember them at the moment. I DID, however, remember to hang up my jacket.

 

Is there something you never seem to learn?