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Alltop, confirmation that I kick ass

Author: toni

~ 03/30/10


I don’t know about you, but I get a little irritated by people who go on about “the good old days”.  Like the days we live in are so horrible. Yeah sure, we have things like global warming. nuclear threat, terrorism, malaria epidemics, water shortages and Meg Ryan’s creepy new face. But you know what we DON’T have anymore?

Jello mold salads with veggies in them.



I mean, who thought this disgusting abomination would make a good meal? Am I supposed to like it better because I can SEE the veggies through the jello? Ew. Suddenly Hamburger Helper and Spam don’t look so bad. Unless, you know, you substituted the Spam for the hamburger in the helper.

Also, I don’t know if you can read the fine print, but they suggest serving this with tartar sauce or pimento.

All I can think is that, like the cinema of the 50s that featured BLOBS and 100 foot spiders, the food of the era also reflected the paranoia of nuclear threat: freakish and suspended in blob-like material.

Anyway, I don’t care how many strands of pearls I would have owned if I lived in the 50s, if I had to make or EAT this thing for dinner, it wouldn’t be worth it.

Know why else the 50’s weren’t so great? Flips flops not considered formal wear. Now that’s a deal breaker, fer sure!

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