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Alltop, confirmation that I kick ass

Author: toni

~ 09/08/10


  Apparently I missed Mr. Blackwell’s latest memo because I had no idea that Underoos were now considered appropriate attire for Disneyland.

Yep. We were standing in line at the Buzz Lightyear Astro Blasters ride last weekend and there, right next to us, was a LITTLE BOY wearing nothing but a shirt and his underpants!    

No, he wasn’t a toddler in a diaper (which I also personally think is inappropriate).  This kid was apparently big enough to walk, talk, demand funnel cake and go to the bathroom by himself. And here he was going from attraction to attraction in his underwear!  I don’t care that they were Disney-themed with little Mickey Mouses on them. That doesn’t make it okay! Think about the hygiene implications here! To make matters worse, these underpants were even the kind with the little  door for easy access to his boy parts for peeing and  “what-not”. And as he jumped around and jiggled and jaggled in line as impatient children are wont to do, his boys parts more than once made an appearance. Not only that, there was also some serious “what-not” going on too as he repeatedly stuck his hand in the trap door and then handled the handrail. The only thing missing in this scene was a recliner and Bud Light!  

I mean, it’s bad enough kids pick their noses and touch everything in sight, now I have to see them fondling their wankees and touching the same handrail as me and my kid!

I can only assume that his parents allowed him to dress like this for the sake of convenience. After all, those lines at the bathroom can be sooooo long. This way he could whip it out whenever he liked and easily relieve himself  on the patch of pansies arranged in the shape of Minnie’s head or in Snow White’s wishing well. 

          “One day my prince will come!” 

Sorry Snow White. This kid ain’t gonna be him.

On the other hand, thanks to his mom, he should have no trouble pledging a fraternity when the time comes.

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  1. This is NOTHING! How about the deceased’s daughter wearing a tube top with frayed hot pants and Manolo Blahnik stiletos to her own father’s funeral? If you think this is inappropriate, check out “” to see the decline of American Civilization. No wonder 20% believe Obama is a Muslim. No wonder there is no outcry when John Boehner says, “We need to return to the policies of the Bush Administration.” No wonder a photogenic airhead (a self-righteous, born-again, prima-donna, abstence proclaiming, hypocritical, contradicting, mother supporting a teenage single mom/daughter, attention seeking, money driven, sold out, Constitution oblivious, ignorant-beyond-belief, main-stream-media-addicted whore, QUITTER), such as Sarah Palin, could even be MENTIONED as a possible Presidential Candidate in 2012. Wanna bet that the parents of this toddler you saw at Disneyland love Palin and think Glenn Beck tells the truth? WAKE UP! We are analogous to the people watching the Roman Empire decline. One crucial difference and one similarity: 1) electricity and computers should shorten the time for the Roman collapse, from 50-400 years, to a more contemporary multitasked Internet speed of 5-20 years; 2) there is NOTHING we can do to change the inexorable flow of energy. Entropy IS downhill flow.

    Oh, yeah, don’t forget to burn a Koran on Saturday! And count on Social Security ending, too. Don’t think so? Carly F. and Meg W., the two MOST DANGEROUS PEOPLE IN THE USA, after Dick Cheney, actually have California voters supporting them!

    Comment by Bruce — September 8, 2010 @ 7:31 pm

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